Helloooo! Spur of the moment post here.
I’m work-from-coffee-shop today. Latte, laptop, and yess they’re playing Lykke Li, to complete my L-list. I was pretty relaxed up until about 10 minutes ago, but now I’m annoyed. Ten minutes ago, a pretty normal looking dude came over and struck up a conversation. Nothing too unusual, and as usual, after I felt I’d done my polite duty, I tried to wrap it up:
“It was nice talking, but I have to get back to my work.”
He responded by saying something about taking a lunch break and hanging out, to which I said “I’m sorry, I’m really here to work, not to meet people.”
Then he said the thing that annoyed me.
“Come on, if you didn’t want to meet someone, why would you be here alone looking cute like that?”
His delivery suggested it was supposed to be a compliment or a flirtation, but seriously? Condescending and obnoxious. I didn’t realize that if I went out in the world as an unescorted female, it was my obligation to get picked up by dudes. Also, I’m wearing jeans and a plaid shirt…basically the same outfit as this Indian guy next to me, and he’s making it way cuter with his furrowed brow and new balance sneaks. Go chat him up instead.
Oh strangers. Why you gotta be so annoying? It's disturbing because as I said, this guy seems pretty normal, so I'm sure others share his feeling that if a girl is out alone, she probably wants to talk to him. I mean, I somewhat understand their plight: I know girls are scarce in this area, and dudes are pressured by their peers to be aggressive and get as many numbers as they can. But I really can't respect that mentality. And if I tell you I'm not trying to hang out with you, then I'd appreciate just being believed.
I didn't feel like getting into a debate with this dude, so all I said was “I’m here because I own a business but not an office, and I’m really not cute at all.”
Yeahhh I know, I’m extremely bad at comebacks and need to learn how to respond without putting myself down. Anyway, he’s back in his seat now. At first I felt the urge to leave because it’s a little uncomfortable in his line of sight, but fuck that. I don't want to let a poorly-informed dude make me feel like I should remove myself from where I chose to work. So I just decided to write this post instead!
Little occurrences like this make me think of a video I saw a few weeks back. My attention span for youtube is not the best, so I haven't watched the whole thing yet. But seeing the contrast of men experiencing what women experience regularly is so wonderfully thought-provoking, and at times, hilarious, thanks to the great acting:
Okay back to work! Have a lovely day everyone! xo